Continued from last week.

The goals of people who have been fired can almost invariably be summarized by one or more of the following four statements:

1. They want their job back.
2. They want money from their soon-to-be ex-employer.
3. They want to regain their self-respect.
4. They want justice.

(Please see last week’s post for an exploration of the first two goals.)

3. Regaining your self-respect.

What most employees who are being fired really crave – and the reason that the employer’s offer to let you resign can be so appealing – is to undo the deep sense of shame and failure that can come with being fired.  

More than just the chance to resign, however, employees often also seek some affirmative statement or acknowledgment from the employer that the loss of employment was not a result of the employee’s own shortcomings.

What employees therefore crave, in many cases, is an apology or an admission that the breakdown in the employer-employee relationship was largely (if not solely) the fault of the employer, not the employee.  They want some acknowledgment from the employer that it was the employer itself – not the employee – who behaved badly.

Employees may also want some reprimand or discipline to be issued to the particular supervisors or managers who treated the fired employee badly, and/or the initiation of some structural or institutional changes that would demonstrate precisely who was and was not at fault for the situation that led to the employee’s termination.

These are by far harder goals to achieve than a mere financial settlement.   Because companies are run by people who often care just as much about their self-respect as the employees whom they have fired, it is nearly impossible to achieve anything approaching an apology or acknowledgment of wrongdoing.   

Under the right circumstances, however, some approximation of these goals may be achieved, especially at the institutional level, if the employee is willing to push hard for them.  It is vital to know at the outset that this is what you are seeking above all else, however, so that you can direct your efforts in this direction.

4. Getting justice.

Many employees’ goals go even further down this road. What they really want is not to get their jobs back, not a substantial financial award, and not even (or not merely) an apology or some equivalent type of acknowledgment, but something that can best be described as justice. They want the employer to be publicly punished, shamed or humiliated for its wrongdoing, and they want to prevent future employees from being victimized by this employer in the same way that they were. 

There may be a world (outside of the movies) where fired employees obtain this type of satisfaction from their former employers, but I’ve only rarely seen it.  You might even read in the newspapers or see on the television news a story of a company hit with a multi-million-dollar verdict for wrongfully discharging an employee and think, “Now that must be gratifying.”   If you talk to anyone who has been involved in that type of litigation, however, you are likely to learn that surprisingly little personal satisfaction was actually obtained.  

Far be it for me to discourage the pursuit of justice or any effort to punish evildoers on this planet, but in terms of practical advice to a fired employee who is not particularly driven to emulate Karen Silkwood or Norma Rae, the most I can say is: let it go.   You’re not going to get an apology.  You’re not going to get an acknowledgement that you were right and they were wrong.  And they’re never going to be held up to public shame and accountability for how they treated you.  These are not within the realm of realistic, achievable goals, and all you will get from pursuing them is heartache.

Upcoming blog: What To Do When You're Fired, Part 5: Evaluate Your Options